TBH, it got off to a bit of a bad start when Dave rocked up at the station in Suzhou at 3pm to be told that the next (2hr) train to Shanghai left at the time the wedding started. A bit of haggling later, and Y350 worse off, he was en route but estimated he would be about an hour later, so I made the executive decision to go it alone (I have never been very good at slipping in unannounced, and especially not in China - I blame the hair....).
And so it was that, clutching my hongbao, I arrived and was thrust into a photograph with the bride and groom. I signed in on a big piece of red cardboard and wrote my 'wishes' in a small gift tag. All, while desperately offering my now-obviously-cheap-and-tacky-version-of-a hongbao to everyone and anyone in the vicinity until it was eventually taken off my hands..... *phew*
I headed straight for my spot in the seating plan, predictably on the laowai table, and watched in amazement and trepidation as a huge variety of foods were set out before us. *tip* At about 7pm the formalities began, and from 5.30 until then, the food and drink was off limits - so plan carefully!
As far as I can tell, Chinese weddings work differently to those in the UK. For example, you need to register and the marriage itself is a brief civil ceremony that does not attract much attention. Most important are the subsequent celebration-come-party-come-food-fests, with a range of traditions and anomalies thrown in for good measure.
The wedding ceremony was carried out by an MC with a microphone - this chap really was an all-singing, all-dancing marry-maker who I feel would not be out of place in Vegas. Keep an eye out for him, where's Wally style, below.
After some video clips of the bride and groom each talking individually about how they met, how they fell in love, and what the other's person's flaws are, there was a parade down a neon-flashing runway to the stage, which was decorated in sparkly pink, and came complete with a bubble-making machine:
There was some more MC action, before the exchanging of the rings. It took us a while to work out what was going on when an enormous gold box was placed in front of the happy couple, but when it was opened, helium balloons flew out, and each of the bunches that were left tied on to the box held a ring! Genius. I can't help feeling that this kind of stunt has disaster written all over it, but no calamities in this case...
Then came the cake-cutting and the more spectacular pink champagne fountain!
At this point, the couple were pronounced married and *tip* this is the cue for everyone to start eating and drinking the vast spread in front of them (see separate post!). This merriment continued until the MC takes to the stage and begins part two, involving speeches from most people in the room - mothers (see below on the flashing catwalk), fathers, grandparents - and presentations of flowers. *tip* The etiquette at this point seems to be to eat, drink and carry on as normal, paying a modicum of attention to the proceedings if you feel like it (unless you are under the age of 10, when it seems to be your duty to cause as much disruption as possible).
Stage three is where things start to get exciting - especially if you are a guest who has yet to participate! A small tree was produced with greeting tags on that everyone has written on arrival, and then it starts off with family members being called to stage to pick one, and then that person reads his wishes out and wins a prize!
More and more people are called up from their tables at random ("pretty girl, come on down!") until the prizes run out, and completely bewildered laowai are encouraged to stutter some Chinese on stage, to raucous cheers, applause and prizes (cuddly toys and handbags):
And last but not least is the cake-feeding game. Apparently, the tradition used to be for groups of people to go round to one of the family homes and play this game until there was no cake left, but here we made do with three couples on stage, one of each who was blindfolded and being fed cake. The quickest to eat the cake, won! Hilarious, but perhaps less so if you are chosen for this game and wearing your Sunday best, so *tip* get involved earlier on if you can!
Everyone finally turns back to the dinner table, while serenaded by family members and the MC (obv), and the bride and groom go around each table in turn, toasting every single guest. To this end, they are followed by assistants to ensure they never run out of their drink of choice! As there were about 150 guests, Binhong was very sensible to stick to Coke! More sensible than the inevitable drunk uncle, who followed, ganbei-ing a full glass of wine with all and sundry...What happened next was a bit odd - it was about 9.30pm and suddenly the room emptied, without rhyme or reason! We decided to follow suit, but several people still had their hongbaos to get rid of (*tip* give them to the groom or one of the mothers!). Dave and I ended up in the bar on the 88th floor of the Jinmao tower for a cocktail and a dissection of the evening's events before heading home.
what a great day for all!
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